View:
By Line
256
(Enter STRATILAX, from the house of the FATHER of STRABAX.)
STRATILAX
Who’s this
1
, that’s so sturdily plying his batteringram against our door?
Who’s this
1
, that’s so sturdily plying his batteringram against our door?
ASTAPHIUM
It’s I. Look round at me.
It’s I. Look round at me.
STRATILAX
Who’s I?
Who’s I?
ASTAPHIUM
Am I not seen by you?
2
Am I not seen by you?
2
STRATILAX
(turning to her.)
Woe worth thee! What mean you by this coming so near this door, or why’s this knocking?
Woe worth thee! What mean you by this coming so near this door, or why’s this knocking?
ASTAPHIUM
Health to you.
Health to you.
STRATILAX
Enow of thy health have I; I care nought for’t, I’ve got no health;
I’d rather be sick, than be a bit the sounder with health from thee. This I want to know, what’s owing thee here in our house?
260
Enow of thy health have I; I care nought for’t, I’ve got no health;
I’d rather be sick, than be a bit the sounder with health from thee. This I want to know, what’s owing thee here in our house?
260
ASTAPHIUM
Do keep close—
Do keep close—
STRATILAX
Yea, faith, to my own good woman I trust; let him keep close to thee whose habit ’tis. A rare fine joke! a silly hussy to be tempting a countryman to naughty tricks.
Yea, faith, to my own good woman I trust; let him keep close to thee whose habit ’tis. A rare fine joke! a silly hussy to be tempting a countryman to naughty tricks.
ASTAPHIUM
Keep close your anger, I meant.
Keep close your anger, I meant.
STRATILAX
ASTAPHIUM
(half to herself.)
Really this fellow’s very churlish.
265
Really this fellow’s very churlish.
265
STRATILAX
Woman, dost thee go on abusing me?
Woman, dost thee go on abusing me?
ASTAPHIUM
Why, what did I say to you?
Why, what did I say to you?
STRATILAX
Why, because thee dost call me churlish. Therefore now, if thee doesn’t be off this instant, and tell me quickly what thee want’st, adzookers, woman, I’ll be, here this very instant, trampling thee beneath my feet like a sow her piglings.
Why, because thee dost call me churlish. Therefore now, if thee doesn’t be off this instant, and tell me quickly what thee want’st, adzookers, woman, I’ll be, here this very instant, trampling thee beneath my feet like a sow her piglings.
ASTAPHIUM
This is indeed right country,
and no mistake; ’tis an abominable and truly a monkey race.
This is indeed right country,
and no mistake; ’tis an abominable and truly a monkey race.
STRATILAX
(holding up his fist.)
Dost thee throw the country in my teeth, when thee hast found a man who’s ashamed of what’s foul?
280
Hast thee come hither to tempt me with thy decked out bones
5
? Was it for that, shameless slut, thee dyed thy mantle of its smoke-dried colour, or art thee so fine because that thee’s been a stealing?
270
Come thee towards me then.
Dost thee throw the country in my teeth, when thee hast found a man who’s ashamed of what’s foul?
280
Hast thee come hither to tempt me with thy decked out bones
5
? Was it for that, shameless slut, thee dyed thy mantle of its smoke-dried colour, or art thee so fine because that thee’s been a stealing?
270
Come thee towards me then.
ASTAPHIUM
Now you charm me.
Now you charm me.
STRATILAX
How much I wish I could charm thee.
How much I wish I could charm thee.
ASTAPHIUM
You tell a lie.
6
You tell a lie.
6
STRATILAX
Tell me—
7
Tell me—
7
ASTAPHIUM
What?
8
What?
8
STRATILAX
What I ask thee. Dost thee wish to be taken for a bondswoman, who dost carry on thee those rings?
(Pointing to her fingers.)
What I ask thee. Dost thee wish to be taken for a bondswoman, who dost carry on thee those rings?
ASTAPHIUM
They give them to those who are worthy.
275
They give them to those who are worthy.
275
STRATILAX
(Lays hold of her.)
ASTAPHIUM
Don’t be touching me.
(Moving away.)
Don’t be touching me.
STRATILAX
I, touch thee? So help me my weeding-hoe, I’d rather i’ the country for me to be harnessed like an ox with crumpled horns, and with it spend the livelong night upon the straw, than that a hundred nights with thee, with a dinner apiece, were given me for nothing!
But what business, woman, hast thee at our house? Why dost thee come running this way as often as we come to town?
I, touch thee? So help me my weeding-hoe, I’d rather i’ the country for me to be harnessed like an ox with crumpled horns, and with it spend the livelong night upon the straw, than that a hundred nights with thee, with a dinner apiece, were given me for nothing!
But what business, woman, hast thee at our house? Why dost thee come running this way as often as we come to town?
ASTAPHIUM
I want to meet with your women.
I want to meet with your women.
STRATILAX
What women art thee talking to me about, when there’s not even a single woman-fly within the house?
What women art thee talking to me about, when there’s not even a single woman-fly within the house?
ASTAPHIUM
What, does no woman live here?
285
What, does no woman live here?
285
STRATILAX
They’ve gone into the country, I say. Be off.
They’ve gone into the country, I say. Be off.
ASTAPHIUM
Why are you bawling out, you lunatic?
Why are you bawling out, you lunatic?
STRATILAX
If thee doesn’t make haste to get away from this with prodigious speed, I’ll forthwith be separating even from thy brains those falsified, daintily arranged, corkscrew curls of thine, with all their grease as well.
If thee doesn’t make haste to get away from this with prodigious speed, I’ll forthwith be separating even from thy brains those falsified, daintily arranged, corkscrew curls of thine, with all their grease as well.
ASTAPHIUM
For what reason, pray?
For what reason, pray?
STRATILAX
Why, because thee hast even presumed to approach our door anointed up with thine unguents, and because thee hast those cheeks so nicely, painted pink.
Why, because thee hast even presumed to approach our door anointed up with thine unguents, and because thee hast those cheeks so nicely, painted pink.
ASTAPHIUM
I’ troth, it was by reason of your clamour that I coloured in my alarm.
I’ troth, it was by reason of your clamour that I coloured in my alarm.
STRATILAX
And is it so? Thee coloured? As though, hussy, thee really hadst left to thy skin the power of receiving any colour. Redden up thy cheeks, thee hast given all thy skin its colour with chalk
11
.
Ye are scoundrelly jades.
295
What’s the reason, abominable hussies, that this way
?
I know more than thee think’st I know.
And is it so? Thee coloured? As though, hussy, thee really hadst left to thy skin the power of receiving any colour. Redden up thy cheeks, thee hast given all thy skin its colour with chalk
11
.
Ye are scoundrelly jades.
295
What’s the reason, abominable hussies, that this way
?
I know more than thee think’st I know.
ASTAPHIUM
Prithee, what’s this that you know?
Prithee, what’s this that you know?
STRATILAX
How Strabax, my master’s son, is ruining himself at your house; how you are all enticing him to fraud and present-making.
How Strabax, my master’s son, is ruining himself at your house; how you are all enticing him to fraud and present-making.
ASTAPHIUM
If you appeared in your senses, I’d tell you. You’re uttering abuse only;
not a person is in the habit of being ruined here at our house; they waste their property; when they’ve wasted their property, they may go bare thence, if they choose. I don’t know this young man of yours.
300
If you appeared in your senses, I’d tell you. You’re uttering abuse only;
not a person is in the habit of being ruined here at our house; they waste their property; when they’ve wasted their property, they may go bare thence, if they choose. I don’t know this young man of yours.
300
STRATILAX
Indeed so.
Indeed so.
ASTAPHIUM
In sober truth.
12
In sober truth.
12
STRATILAX
Aye, but that garden wall
13
that’s in our garden says so, which is becoming every night less by a brick, over which he travels to your house on the road to destruction.
Aye, but that garden wall
13
that’s in our garden says so, which is becoming every night less by a brick, over which he travels to your house on the road to destruction.
ASTAPHIUM
The wall’s an old one; it isn’t wonderful if the bricks, being old, do tumble down.
305
The wall’s an old one; it isn’t wonderful if the bricks, being old, do tumble down.
305
STRATILAX
And says thee, hussy, that old bricks do tumble down? By my fakes, may never any mortal man henceforth trust me upon the two grand points
14
, if I don’t inform of these goings on of yours to my elder master.
And says thee, hussy, that old bricks do tumble down? By my fakes, may never any mortal man henceforth trust me upon the two grand points
14
, if I don’t inform of these goings on of yours to my elder master.
ASTAPHIUM
Is he a savage as well?
Is he a savage as well?
STRATILAX
Why, he didn’t get his money by enriching harlots, but by thriftiness,
and living hard; which now, however, is being carried off to you, abominable jades.
(Takes her by the shoulders and shakes her.) There’s for thee, six-clawed hussy; a wretched life to both of ye. Am I to keep mum about these matters? But, lookye now, I’ll be off to the Forum at once and tell these goings on to the old gentleman, that he mayn’t somehow be cherishing within this matting
15
a whole swarm of misfortunes.
(Exit.)
Why, he didn’t get his money by enriching harlots, but by thriftiness,
and living hard; which now, however, is being carried off to you, abominable jades.
(Takes her by the shoulders and shakes her.) There’s for thee, six-clawed hussy; a wretched life to both of ye. Am I to keep mum about these matters? But, lookye now, I’ll be off to the Forum at once and tell these goings on to the old gentleman, that he mayn’t somehow be cherishing within this matting
15
a whole swarm of misfortunes.
ASTAPHIUM
(to herself.)
Upon my faith, if this fellow were living on mustard, I don’t think he could possibly be as snappish. But, i’ troth, how much a well-wisher to his master he is. Still, although he is a savage, I trust that he can be changed by coaxing, allurements, and other arts of the courtesan. I’ve seen a horse from unruly become tamed, and other brutes as well.
315
Now I’ll go back to see my mistress. But see, my plague’s coming out.
(The door of PHRONESIUM’S house is opened.) He’s coming out with a sad air; he hasn’t even yet had a meeting with Phronesium.
320
Upon my faith, if this fellow were living on mustard, I don’t think he could possibly be as snappish. But, i’ troth, how much a well-wisher to his master he is. Still, although he is a savage, I trust that he can be changed by coaxing, allurements, and other arts of the courtesan. I’ve seen a horse from unruly become tamed, and other brutes as well.
315
Now I’ll go back to see my mistress. But see, my plague’s coming out.
(The door of PHRONESIUM’S house is opened.) He’s coming out with a sad air; he hasn’t even yet had a meeting with Phronesium.
320
Truculentus. Plautus. Henry Thomas Riley (Translator). London. 1913.
Sponsored by Perseus Project, Tufts University.
Funding provided by NSF, NEH: Digital Libraries Initiative, Phase 2.