GELASIMUS
(to himself.)
I’ve consulted my books; I’m as sure as possible,
that by my funny bon mots I shall recover my patron
1
. Now I’m going to see whether he has arrived by this from the harbour, that when he comes I may smooth him down with my speeches.
455
EPIGNOMUS
Surely, this is Gelasimus, the Parasite, that’s coming.
GELASIMUS
(to himself.)
With lucky auspices, by my troth, this day did I come out of doors;
since an omen auspiciously befel me
2
. This was beheld by me; how a weasel carried off a mouse close at my feet. For as she found sustenance for herself this day, so do I hope that I shall do, as the augury predicts.
460
(Sees EPIGNOMUS.) Surely this is Epignomus that’s standing here; I’ll go and address him. My dear Epignomus, how pleased I am to see you now; how my tears are starting forth for very joy. Have you all along enjoyed your health?
465
EPIGNOMUS
With care it has been preserved.
GELASIMUS
Right heartily I wish you health
3
.
EPIGNOMUS
You speak kindly, and like a friend. May the Gods grant what you wish.
GELASIMUS
EPIGNOMUS
I, sup there with you?
GELASIMUS
Since you are returned safe.
4
EPIGNOMUS
Really, an engagement has been made already; but I give you thanks.
GELASIMUS
Do promise me.
EPIGNOMUS
It’s settled.
GELASIMUS
But do, I say.
EPIGNOMUS
The thing’s agreed on.
GELASIMUS
By my troth, you’d do it with much pleasure to me.
EPIGNOMUS
I know that well.
When an opportunity shall come, it shall be so.
475
GELASIMUS
Now, then, is the opportunity.
EPIGNOMUS
I’ faith, I cannot.
GELASIMUS
Why make difficulties? Do consider; I have I know not what luxuries at hand
5
.
EPIGNOMUS
Do be off, now; seek for yourself another guest for to-day.
GELASIMUS
You promise, then?
EPIGNOMUS
I would make no difficulty if I could.
GELASIMUS
Really, on my word, one thing, for sure, I promise you, I’d entertain you with pleasure, beyond a doubt, if you would promise.
480
EPIGNOMUS
Adieu!
(Moving.)
GELASIMUS
Have you resolved?
EPIGNOMUS
I have resolved. I shall dine at home.
GELASIMUS
(aside.)
Since nothing has been effected this way, I’ll therefore approach him by a more open path, and I’ll speak plainly out.
(To EPIGNOMUS.) Since you, yourself, are not willing to promise to come to me,
should you like that I should come to dine with you?
EPIGNOMUS
If it were possible, I should like it; but here are nine other people
6
coming to dine at my house.
GELASIMUS
For my part, I don’t ask that I should recline on the couch; you know that I’m a man for the lower seats.
EPIGNOMUS
GELASIMUS
Let then the deputies of a people, your tip-top men, recline at the tip-top place; I, the lowest, in the lowest quarter.
EPIGNOMUS
It isn’t proper for you to be entertained among deputies.
GELASIMUS
I ’faith, and I—I’m a deputy, too
8
, but little it does avail me.
495
EPIGNOMUS
I intend that to-morrow we shall dine upon the scraps. Sincerely, farewell.
(Goes into his house.)
GELASIMUS
By my troth, ’tis clear that I’m undone, and by no fault of my own
9
. The number is less than it was before by one Gelasimus. I’m resolved, hereafter, never to believe in a weasel,
for I know of no beast more uncertain than her. She who herself is ten times a day shifting her place, from her have I taken my omens in matters of life and death to me! I’m determined to call my friends together, to take counsel how by rule I must starve henceforth.
500
(Exit.)
Stichus. Plautus. Henry Thomas Riley (Translator). London. 1912.
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