Lycinus
Monstrous sly, is it not, to say ‘mutual’ instead of ‘joint'? Well, that is settled up; but for your general ignorance, I defy any God short of Apollo to cure it. He gives council to all who ask it; but on you that council is thrown away.
Monstrous sly, is it not, to say ‘mutual’ instead of ‘joint'? Well, that is settled up; but for your general ignorance, I defy any God short of Apollo to cure it. He gives council to all who ask it; but on you that council is thrown away.
Purist
Yes, I declare, so it was!
Yes, I declare, so it was!
Lycinus
Perhaps one at a time are too few?
Perhaps one at a time are too few?
Purist
I think that must be it.
I think that must be it.
Lycinus
How did ‘one are’ get past you?
How did ‘one are’ get past you?
Purist
Ah, I didn’t see it, again.
Ah, I didn’t see it, again.
Lycinus
By the way, do you know of any one who is on the look in for a wife?
By the way, do you know of any one who is on the look in for a wife?
Purist
What are you talking about?
What are you talking about?
Lycinus
Show me the man who is on the look in, and I will show you a solecist.
Show me the man who is on the look in, and I will show you a solecist.
Purist
But what have I to do with solecists on the look in for wives?
But what have I to do with solecists on the look in for wives?
Lycinus
Ah, if you knew that, you would be the man you pretend to be. So much for that. Now, if a man came to you and said that he had left his wife’s home, would you stand that?
Ah, if you knew that, you would be the man you pretend to be. So much for that. Now, if a man came to you and said that he had left his wife’s home, would you stand that?
Purist
Of course I should, if he had provocation.
Of course I should, if he had provocation.
Lycinus
And if you caught him committing a solecism, would 5 you stand it?
And if you caught him committing a solecism, would 5 you stand it?
Purist
Certainly not.
Certainly not.
Lycinus
Quite right too. We should never permit solecisms in a friend, but teach him better. Now, what are your feelings when you hear a man deprecating his own merits, and depreciating his friend’s excessive gratitude?
Quite right too. We should never permit solecisms in a friend, but teach him better. Now, what are your feelings when you hear a man deprecating his own merits, and depreciating his friend’s excessive gratitude?
Purist
Feelings? only that he shows a very proper feeling.
Feelings? only that he shows a very proper feeling.
Lycinus
Then, as you cannot feel the difference between ‘deprecate’ and ‘depreciate,’ shall we conclude that you are an ignoramus?
Then, as you cannot feel the difference between ‘deprecate’ and ‘depreciate,’ shall we conclude that you are an ignoramus?
Purist
Outrageous insolence!
Outrageous insolence!
Lycinus
Outrageous? I shall be, ere much, if I go on talking to you.—Now I should have said that ‘ere much’ was a blunder, but it does not strike you so.
Outrageous? I shall be, ere much, if I go on talking to you.—Now I should have said that ‘ere much’ was a blunder, but it does not strike you so.
Soleocista. Lucian. Henry Watson Fowler (Translator), Francis George Fowler (Translator). Medford, MA, USA. 2023-08-01.
Sponsored by Tufts University.
Funding provided by National Endowment for the Humanities.