THRASO
Did Thais really return me many thanks?
390
GNATHO
Exceeding thanks.
THRASO
Was she delighted, say you?
GNATHO
Not so much, indeed, at the present itself, as because it was given by you; really, in right earnest, she does exult at that.
(Enter PARMIENO unseen, from LACHES’ house.)
PARMENO
(apart.)
I’ve come here to be on the look-out, that when there is an opportunity I may take the presents. But see, here’s the Captain.
THRASO
Undoubtedly it is the case with me
, that every thing I do is a cause for thankfulness.
395
GNATHO
Upon my faith, I’ve observed it.
THRASO
The most mighty King,
1
even, always used to give me especial thanks for whatever I did; but not so to others.
GNATHO
He who has the wit that you have, often by his words appropriates to himself the glory that has been achieved by the labor of others.
THRASO
You’ve just hit it.
2
GNATHO
The king, then, kept you in his eye.
3
THRASO
Just so.
GNATHO
To enjoy your society.
THRASO
True; he intrusted to me all his army, all his state secrets.
GNATHO
Astonishing!
THRASO
Then if, on any occasion, a surfeit of society, or a dislike of business, came upon him, when he was desirous to take some recreation; just as though—you understand?
4
GNATHO
I know;
just as though on occasion he would rid his mind of those anxieties.
405
THRASO
You have it. Then he used to take me aside as his only boon companion.
GNATHO
Whew! You are telling of a King of refined taste.
THRASO
Aye, he is a person of that sort; a man of but very few acquaintanceships.
GNATHO
(aside.)
Indeed, of none,
5
I fancy, if he’s on intimate terms with you.
THRASO
All the people envied me,
and attacked me privately. I don’t care one straw. They envied me dreadfully; but one in particular, whom the King had appointed over the Indian elephants.
6
Once, when he became particularly troublesome,
Prithee, Strato, said I,
are you so fierce because you hold command over the wild beasts?
410
GNATHO
Cleverly said, upon my faith, and shrewdly. Astounding! You did give the fellow a home thrust. What said he?
415
THRASO
Dumfounded, instantaneously.
GNATHO
How could he be otherwise?
PARMENO
(apart.)
Ye Gods, by our trust in you! a lost and miserable fellow the one, and the other a scoundrel.
THRASO
Well then, about that: matter, Gnatho, the way in which I touched up the Rhodian at a banquet—
did I never tell you?
420
GNATHO
Never; but pray, do tell me.
(Aside.) I’ve heard it more than a thousand times already.
THRASO
There was in my company at a banquet, this young man of Rhodes, whom I’m speaking of. By chance I had a mistress there; he began to toy with her, and to annoy me.
What are you doing, sir impudence? said I to the fellow;
a hare yourself, and looking out for game?
7
425
GNATHO
(pretending to laugh very heartily.)
Ha, ha, ha!
THRASO
What’s the matter?
GNATHO
How apt, how smart, how clever; nothing could be more excellent. Prithee, was this a saying of yours? I fancied it was an old one.
THRASO
Did you ever hear it before?
GNATHO
Many a time; and it is mentioned among the first-rate ones.
THRASO
It’s my own.
GNATHO
I’m sorry though that it was said to a thoughtless young man, and one of respectability.
PARMENO
(apart.)
May the Gods confound you!
430
GNATHO
Pray, what did he do?
THRASO
Quite disconcerted. All who were present were dying with laughter; in short, they were all quite afraid of me.
GNATHO
[Not without reason.
THRASO
But hark you, had I best clear myself of this to Thais, as to her suspicion that I’m fond of this girl?
GNATHO
By no means:
on the contrary, rather increase her jealousy.
435
THRASO
Why so?
GNATHO
Do you ask me? Don’t you see, if on any occasion she makes mention of Phaedria or commends him, to provoke you—
THRASO
I understand.
GNATHO
That such may not be the case, this method is the only remedy. When she speaks of Phaedria, do you instantly mention Pamphila.
If at any time she says,
Let’s invite Phaedria to make one, do you say,
Let’s ask Pamphila to sing. If she praises his good looks, do you, on the other hand, praise hers. In short, do you return like for like, which will mortify her.
440
THRASO
If, indeed, she loved me,
8
this might be of some use, Gnatho.
445
GNATHO
Since she is impatient for and loves that which you give her, she already loves you; as it is, then, it is an easy matter for her to feel vexed. She will be always afraid lest the presents which she herself is now getting, you may on some occasion be taking elsewhere.
THRASO
Well said; that never came into my mind.
450
GNATHO
Nonsense. You never thought about it; else how much more readily would you yourself have hit upon it, Thraso!
Eunuchus. Publius Terentius Afer (Terence). Henry Thomas Riley (Translator), George Colman (Translator). Ney York. 1874.
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