View:
By Line
273
(Enter CYLINDRUS, with a basket of provisions.)
CYLINDRUS
I’ve catered well, and to my mind. I’ll set a good breakfast before the breakfasters.
But see, I perceive Menaechmus. Woe to my back; the guests are now already walking before the door, before I’ve returned with the provisions. I’ll go and accost him. Save you, Menaechmus.
275
I’ve catered well, and to my mind. I’ll set a good breakfast before the breakfasters.
But see, I perceive Menaechmus. Woe to my back; the guests are now already walking before the door, before I’ve returned with the provisions. I’ll go and accost him. Save you, Menaechmus.
275
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
The Gods bless you, whoever you are.
The Gods bless you, whoever you are.
CYLINDRUS
who I am?
who I am?
MESSENIO
I’ faith, not I, indeed.
280
I’ faith, not I, indeed.
280
CYLINDRUS
Where are the other guests?
Where are the other guests?
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
What guests are you enquiring about?
What guests are you enquiring about?
CYLINDRUS
Your Parasite.
Your Parasite.
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
My Parasite? Surely this fellow’s deranged.
My Parasite? Surely this fellow’s deranged.
MESSENIO
Didn’t I tell you that there were many swindlers here?
Didn’t I tell you that there were many swindlers here?
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
What Parasite of mine, young man, are you enquiring about?
285
What Parasite of mine, young man, are you enquiring about?
285
CYLINDRUS
Peniculus.
Peniculus.
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
Where is my
?
Where is my
?
MESSENIO
See, I’ve got your sponge
1
[Peniculus] all safe in the wallet.
See, I’ve got your sponge
1
[Peniculus] all safe in the wallet.
CYLINDRUS
Menaechmus, you’ve come here too soon for breakfast; I’m but now returning with the provisions.
Menaechmus, you’ve come here too soon for breakfast; I’m but now returning with the provisions.
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
Answer me this, young man: at what price do pigs sell here
2
,
unblemished ones, for sacrifice?
290
Answer me this, young man: at what price do pigs sell here
2
,
unblemished ones, for sacrifice?
290
CYLINDRUS
At a didrachm a-piece.
At a didrachm a-piece.
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
(holding out his hand.)
Receive, then, a didrachm of me; bid a sacrifice be made for you at my expense; for, by my faith, I really am sure in very truth that you are deranged, who are annoying me, a person that’s a stranger, whoever you are.
Receive, then, a didrachm of me; bid a sacrifice be made for you at my expense; for, by my faith, I really am sure in very truth that you are deranged, who are annoying me, a person that’s a stranger, whoever you are.
CYLINDRUS
I am Cylindrus; don’t you know my name?
I am Cylindrus; don’t you know my name?
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
Whether you are Cylindrus or Caliendrus
3
, confound you. I don’t know you, and, in fact, I don’t want to know you.
295
Whether you are Cylindrus or Caliendrus
3
, confound you. I don’t know you, and, in fact, I don’t want to know you.
295
CYLINDRUS
Well, your name, however, is Menaechmus, that I do know.
Well, your name, however, is Menaechmus, that I do know.
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
You speak like a sane person when you call me by my name. But where have you known me?
You speak like a sane person when you call me by my name. But where have you known me?
CYLINDRUS
Where have I known you,
you who have Erotium, this mistress of mine
(pointing to the house), for your lady?
300
Where have I known you,
you who have Erotium, this mistress of mine
(pointing to the house), for your lady?
300
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
By my troth, I have not, nor do I know yourself what person you are.
By my troth, I have not, nor do I know yourself what person you are.
CYLINDRUS
Not know who I am, who have many a time filled the cups for your own self at our house, when you’ve been drinking?
Not know who I am, who have many a time filled the cups for your own self at our house, when you’ve been drinking?
MESSENIO
Woe to me, that I’ve got nothing with which to break this fellow’s head.
Woe to me, that I’ve got nothing with which to break this fellow’s head.
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
Are you in the habit of filling the cups for me, who, before this day, have never beheld Epidamnus, nor been there?
305
Are you in the habit of filling the cups for me, who, before this day, have never beheld Epidamnus, nor been there?
305
CYLINDRUS
Do you deny it?
Do you deny it?
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
Upon my honor,, I decidedly do deny it.
Upon my honor,, I decidedly do deny it.
CYLINDRUS
Don’t you live in that house?
(Pointing to the house of MENAECHMUS of Epidamnus.)
Don’t you live in that house?
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
May the Gods send to perdition those that live there.
May the Gods send to perdition those that live there.
CYLINDRUS
Surely, this fellow’s mad, who is thus uttering curses against his own self.
Do you hear, Menaechmus?
310
Surely, this fellow’s mad, who is thus uttering curses against his own self.
Do you hear, Menaechmus?
310
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
What do you want?
What do you want?
CYLINDRUS
If you take my advice, that didrachm, which you just now promised to give me—
you would order, if you were wise, a pig to be procured with it for yourself.
314315
For, i’ faith, you really for sure are not in your senses, Menaechmus, who are now uttering curses against your own self.
If you take my advice, that didrachm, which you just now promised to give me—
you would order, if you were wise, a pig to be procured with it for yourself.
314315
For, i’ faith, you really for sure are not in your senses, Menaechmus, who are now uttering curses against your own self.
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
Alas! By my faith, a very silly fellow, and an annoyance to me.
Alas! By my faith, a very silly fellow, and an annoyance to me.
CYLINDRUS
(to MESSENIO.)
He’s in the habit of often joking with me in this fashion. How very droll he is, when his wife isn’t present. How say you—?
He’s in the habit of often joking with me in this fashion. How very droll he is, when his wife isn’t present. How say you—?
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
What do you mean, you rascal?
What do you mean, you rascal?
CYLINDRUS
(pointing to the basket.)
Has this that you see
been provided in sufficient quantity for three persons, or am I to provide still more for yourself and the Parasite and the lady?
320
Has this that you see
been provided in sufficient quantity for three persons, or am I to provide still more for yourself and the Parasite and the lady?
320
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
What ladies—what Parasites are you talking about?
What ladies—what Parasites are you talking about?
MESSENIO
What, you villain, urges you to be an annoyance to him?
What, you villain, urges you to be an annoyance to him?
CYLINDRUS
Pray what business have you with me? I don’t know you; I’m talking to this person, whom I do know.
Pray what business have you with me? I don’t know you; I’m talking to this person, whom I do know.
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
By my troth, you are not a person in his right senses, that I know for sure.
325
By my troth, you are not a person in his right senses, that I know for sure.
325
CYLINDRUS
I’ll have these things cooked directly; there shall be no delay. Don’t you be going after this anywhere at a distance from the house. Do you want anything?
I’ll have these things cooked directly; there shall be no delay. Don’t you be going after this anywhere at a distance from the house. Do you want anything?
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
You to go to utter and extreme perdition.
You to go to utter and extreme perdition.
CYLINDRUS
I’ faith, ’twere better for you to go in-doors at once and take your place,
while I’m subjecting these things to the strength of the fire
4
. I’ll go in-doors now, and tell Erotium that you are standing here, that she may fetch you away hence, rather than you be standing here out of doors.
330
(He goes into the house.)
I’ faith, ’twere better for you to go in-doors at once and take your place,
while I’m subjecting these things to the strength of the fire
4
. I’ll go in-doors now, and tell Erotium that you are standing here, that she may fetch you away hence, rather than you be standing here out of doors.
330
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
Is he gone then? He is gone. By my faith, I find by experience that your words are not untrue.
Is he gone then? He is gone. By my faith, I find by experience that your words are not untrue.
MESSENIO
Do you only be on your guard;
for I do believe that some woman in the harlot line is living here, as, in fact. this madman said, who has just gone away from here.
335
Do you only be on your guard;
for I do believe that some woman in the harlot line is living here, as, in fact. this madman said, who has just gone away from here.
335
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
But I wonder how he came to know my name.
But I wonder how he came to know my name.
MESSENIO
I’ faith, ’tis far from surprising: courtesans have this custom; they send servant-boys and servant-girls down to the harbour;
if any foreign ship comes into port, they enquire of what country it is, and what its name is; after that, at once they set themselves to work, and fasten themselves upon him; if they inveigle him, they send him home a ruined man. Now in this harbour there stands a piratical craft,
340
against which I really think that we must be on our guard.
345
I’ faith, ’tis far from surprising: courtesans have this custom; they send servant-boys and servant-girls down to the harbour;
if any foreign ship comes into port, they enquire of what country it is, and what its name is; after that, at once they set themselves to work, and fasten themselves upon him; if they inveigle him, they send him home a ruined man. Now in this harbour there stands a piratical craft,
340
against which I really think that we must be on our guard.
345
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
I’ troth, you really counsel aright.
I’ troth, you really counsel aright.
MESSENIO
Then, in fine, shall I be sure that I’ve counselled aright, if you are rightly on your guard.
Then, in fine, shall I be sure that I’ve counselled aright, if you are rightly on your guard.
MENAECHMUS SOSICLES
Be silent for a moment, then; for the door makes a noise. Let’s see who’s coming out from there.
Be silent for a moment, then; for the door makes a noise. Let’s see who’s coming out from there.
MESSENIO
Meanwhile, I’ll lay this down.
(He puts down the wallet.)
Do you keep watch upon these things, if you please, you sailors
5
.
350
Meanwhile, I’ll lay this down.
(He puts down the wallet.)
Do you keep watch upon these things, if you please, you sailors
5
.
350
Menaechmi. Plautus. Henry Thomas Riley (Translator). London. 1912.
Sponsored by Perseus Project, Tufts University.
Funding provided by NSF, NEH: Digital Libraries Initiative, Phase 2.