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VII

Zenophantus

Callidemides

Zenophantus

Ah, Callidemides, and how did you come by your end? As for me, I was free of Dinias’s table, and there died of a surfeit; but that is stale news; you were there, of course.

Callidemides

Yes, I was. Now there was an element of surprise about my fate. I suppose you know that old Ptoeodorus?

Zenophantus

The rich man with no children, to whom you gave most of your company?

Callidemides

That is the man; he had promised to leave me his heir, and I used to show my appreciation. However, it went on such a time; Tithonus was a juvenile to him; so I found a short cut to my property. I bought a potion, and agreed with the butler that next time his master called for wine (he is a pretty stiff drinker) he should have this ready in a cup and present it; and I was pledged to reward the man with his freedom.

Zenophantus

And what happened? this is interesting.

Callidemides

When we came from bath, the young fellow had two cups ready, one with the poison for Ptoeodorus, and the other for me; but by some blunder he handed me the poisoned cup, and Ptoeodorus the plain; and behold, before he had done drinking, there was I sprawling on the ground, a vicarious corpse! Why are you laughing so, Zenophantus? I am your friend; such mirth is unseemly.

Zenophantus

Well, it was such a humorous exit. And how did the old man behave?

Callidemides

He was dreadfully distressed for the moment; then he saw, I suppose, and laughed as much as you over the butler’s trick,

Zenophantus

Ah, short cuts are no better for you than for other people, you see; the high road would have been safer, if not quite so quick.

Henry Watson Fowler

Dialogi mortuorum. Lucian. Henry Watson Fowler (Translator), Francis George Fowler (Translator). Medford, MA, USA. 2023-08-01.

Current edition Perseus

Dialogues of the Dead (English) (The Works of Lucian of Samosata, Vol. 1. Fowler, Henry Watson and Fowler, Francis George, translators. Oxford: Clarendon Press, 1905.)

Editions (2)

Νεκρικοὶ Διάλογοι Perseus (Lucian. Luciani Samosatensis Opera, Vol. 1. Jacobitz, Karl, editor. Leipzig: Teubner, 1909.) — 7 focus

Ζηνόφαντος καὶ Καλλιδημίδης.

Ζηνόφαντος

σὺ δέ, ὦ Καλλιδημίδη, πῶς ἀπέθανες; ἐγὼ μὲν γὰρ ὅτι παράσιτος ὢν Δεινίου πλέον τοῦ ἱκανοῦ ἐμφαγὼν ἀπεπνίγην, οἶσθα· παρῆς γὰρ ἀποθνήσκοντί μοι.

Καλλιδημίδης

παρῆν, ὦ Ζηνόφαντε· τὸ δὲ ἐμὸν παράδοξόν τι ἐγένετο. οἶσθα γὰρ καὶ σύ που Πτοιόδωρον τὸν γέροντα;

Ζηνόφαντος

τὸν ἄτεκνον, τὸν πλούσιον, ᾧ σε τὰ πολλὰ ᾔδειν συνόντα.

Καλλιδημίδης

ἐκεῖνον αὐτὸν ἀεὶ ἐθεράπευον ὑπισχνούμενον ἐπʼ ἐμοὶ τεθνήξεσθαι. ἐπεὶ δὲ τὸ πρᾶγμα ἐς μήκιστον 356 ἐπεγίνετο καὶ ὑπὲρ τὸν Τιθωνὸν ὁ γέρων ἔζη, ἐπίτομόν τινα ὁδὸν ἐπὶ τὸν κλῆρον ἐξεῦρον· πριάμενος γὰρ φάρμακον ἀνέπεισα τὸν οἰνοχόον, ἐπειδὰν τάχιστα ὁ Πτοιόδωρος αἰτήσῃ πιεῖν, — πίνει δὲ ἐπιεικῶς ζωρότερον — ἐμβαλόντα ἐς κύλικα ἕτοιμον ἔχειν αὐτὸ καὶ ἐπιδοῦναι αὐτῷ· εἰ δὲ τοῦτο ποιήσειεν, ἐλεύθερον ἐπωμοσάμην ἀφήσειν αὐτόν.

Ζηνόφαντος

τί οὖν ἐγένετο; πάνυ γάρ τι παράδοξον ἐρεῖν ἔοικας.

Καλλιδημίδης

ἐπεὶ τοίνυν λουσάμενοι ἥκομεν, δύο δὴ ὁ μειρακίσκος κύλικας ἑτοίμους ἔχων τὴν μὲν τῷ Πτοιοδώρῳ τὴν ἔχουσαν τὸ φάρμακον, τὴν δὲ ἑτέραν ἐμοί, σφαλεὶς οὐκ οἶδʼ ὅπως ἐμοὶ μὲν τὸ φάρμακον, Πτοιοδώρῳ 357 δὲ τὸ ἀφάρμακτον ἔδωκεν· εἶτα ὁ μὲν ἔπινεν, ἐγὼ δὲ αὐτίκα μάλα ἐκτάδην ἐκείμην ὑποβολιμαῖος ἀντʼ ἐκείνου νεκρός. τί τοῦτο γελᾷς, ὦ Ζηνόφαντε; καὶ μὴν οὐκ ἔδει γε ἑταίρῳ ἀνδρὶ ἐπιγελᾶν

Ζηνόφαντος

ἀστεῖα γάρ, ὦ Καλλιδημίδη, πέπονθας. ὁ γέρων δὲ τί πρὸς ταῦτα;

Καλλιδημίδης

πρῶτον μὲν ὑπεταράχθη πρὸς τὸ αἰφνίδιον, εἶτα συνείς, οἶμαι, τὸ γεγενημένον ἐγέλα καὶ αὐτός, οἷά γε ὁ οἰνοχόος εἴργασται.

Ζηνόφαντος

πλὴν ἀλλʼ οὐδὲ σὲ τὴν ἐπίτομον ἐχρῆν τραπέσθαι· ἧκε γὰρ ἄν σοι διὰ τῆς λεωφόρου ἀσφαλέστερον, εἰ καὶ ὀλίγῳ βραδύτερον.

Νεκρικοὶ διάλογοι Perseus (Lucian, Vol. 7. Macleod, Matthew Donald, editor. London: William Heinemann, Ltd.; Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press, 1961 (unrenewed copyright).) — 7 focus

406 ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΥ ΚΑΙ ΤΑΝΤΑΛΟΥ

ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ

Τί κλάεις, ὦ Τάνταλε; ἢ τί σεαυτὸν ὀδύρῃ ¹ ἐπὶ τῇ λίμνῃ ἑστώς;

ΤΑΝΤΑΛΟΣ

Ὅτι, ὦ Μένιππε, ἀπόλωλα ὑπὸ τοῦ δίψους.

ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ

Οὕτως ἀργὸς εἶ, ὡς μὴ ἐπικύψας πιεῖν ἢ καὶ νὴ Δί' ἀρυσάμενος κοίλῃ τῇ χειρί;

ΤΑΝΤΑΛΟΣ

Οὐδὲν ὄφελος, εἰ ἐπικύψαιμι· φεύγει γὰρ τὸ ὕδωρ, ἐπειδὰν προσιόντα αἴσθηταί με· ἢν δέ ποτε καὶ ἀρύσωμαι καὶ προσενέγκω τῷ στόματι, οὐ φθάνω βρέξας ἄκρον τὸ χεῖλος, καὶ διὰ τῶν δακτύλων διαρρυὲν οὐκ οἶδ’ ὅπως αὖθις ἀπολείπει ξηρὰν τὴν χεῖρά μοι.

ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ

Τεράστιόν τι πάσχεις, ὦ Τάνταλε. ἀτὰρ εἰπέ μοι, τί δαὶ καὶ δέῃ τοῦ πιεῖν; 407 οὐ γὰρ σῶμα ἔχεις, ἀλλ’ ἐκεῖνο μὲν ἐν Λυδίᾳ που τέθαπται, ὅπερ καὶ πεινῆν καὶ διψῆν ἐδύνατο, σὺ δὲ ἡ ψυχὴ πῶς ἂν ἔτι ἢ διψῴης ἢ πίοις;

ΤΑΝΤΑΛΟΣ

Τοῦτ' αὐτὸ ἡ κόλασίς ἐστι, τὸ διψῆν τὴν ψυχὴν ὡς σῶμα οὖσαν.

ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ

Αλλὰ τοῦτο μὲν οὕτως πιστεύσομεν, ἐπεὶ φῂς κολάζεσθαι τῷ δίψει. τί δ’ οὖν σοι τὸ δεινὸν ἔσται; ἢ δέδιας μὴ ἐνδείᾳ τοῦ ποτοῦ ἀποθάνῃς; οὐχ ὁρῶ γὰρ ἄλλον ᾅδην μετὰ τοῦτον ἢ θάνατον ἐντεῦθεν εἰς ² ἕτερον τόπον.

ΤΑΝΤΑΛΟΣ

Ὀρθῶς μὲν λέγεις· καὶ τοῦτο δ’ οὖν μέρος τῆς καταδίκης, τὸ ἐπιθυμεῖν πιεῖν μηδὲν δεόμενον.

ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ

Ληρεῖς, ὦ Τάνταλε, καὶ ὡς ἀληθῶς ποτοῦ δεῖσθαι δοκεῖς, ἀκράτου γε ἐλλεβόρου νὴ Δία, ὅστις τοὐναντίον τοῖς ὑπὸ τῶν λυττώντων κυνῶν δεδηγμένοις πέπονθας οὐ τὸ ὕδωρ ἀλλὰ τὴν δίψαν πεφοβημένος.

ΤΑΝΤΑΛΟΣ

Οὐδὲ τὸν ἐλλέβορον, ὦ Μένιππε, ἀναίνομαι πιεῖν, γένοιτό μοι μόνον.

408

ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ

Θάρρει, ὦ Τάνταλε, ὡς οὔτε σὺ ³ οὔτε ἄλλος πίεται τῶν νεκρῶν· ἀδύνατον γάρ· καίτοι οὐ πάντες ὥσπερ σὺ ἐκ καταδίκης διψῶσι τοῦ ὕδατος αὐτοὺς οὐχ ὑπομένοντος.

Translations (1)

Dialogues of the Dead Perseus (Lucian, Vol. 7. Macleod, Matthew Donald, translator. London: William Heinemann, Ltd.; Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press, 1961 (unrenewed copyright).) — 7 focus

Menippus And Tantalus

MENIPPUS

Why are you crying, Tantalus? Why do you stand beside ¹ the lake lamenting your lot?

TANTALUS

Because, Menippus, I’m dying of thirst.

MENIPPUS

Are you too lazy to bend your head down and drink, or even, bless us, to scoop the water up with your palm?

TANTALUS

It’s no good bending down; the water runs away as soon as it feels me coming near, and, if ever I do scoop up any, and bring it to my mouth, I can’t wet the tip of my lips before it runs through my fingers somehow and leaves my hand dry as before.

MENIPPUS

You’re the victim of a miracle, Tantalus. But tell me, just why do you need to drink? You have no body, for that’s been buried in Lydia. That could feel hunger and thirst. But you are a ghost; how can you still be thirsty or able to drink?

TANTALUS

It’s just that that’s my punishment—that my ghost should be thirsty as if it were a body.

MENIPPUS

Well, we’ll believe it, since you tell us you’re punished by thirst. But what do you find so terrible in that? Are you afraid of dying for lack of drink? I can’t see another Hades after this one, or a death hereafter taking us elsewhere.

TANTALUS

You are quite right; but this is part of my sentence—to long to drink when I’ve no need.

MENIPPUS

Nonsense, Tantalus: I think you really do need a drink—neat hellebore, ² so help me; you’re the opposite of people bitten by mad dogs; you don’t fear water, but you do fear thirst.

TANTALUS

I don’t mind drinking even hellebore—I only wish I could have some.

MENIPPUS

Don’t worry, Tantalus, for neither you nor any other dead man will drink; that’s impossible. However, they’ve not all been condemned to thirst, as you do, for water which won’t wait for them.

Search the Perseus Catalog for:

Search the Perseus Catalog for:

VII

Zenophantus

Callidemides

Zenophantus Ah, Callidemides, and how did you come by your end? As for me, I was free of Dinias’s table, and there died of a surfeit; but that is stale news; you were there, of course.

Callidemides Yes, I was. Now there was an element of surprise about my fate. I suppose you know that old Ptoeodorus?

Zenophantus The rich man with no children, to whom you gave most of your company?

Zenophantus And what happened? this is interesting.

Zenophantus Well, it was such a humorous exit. And how did the old man behave?

Callidemides He was dreadfully distressed for the moment; then he saw, I suppose, and laughed as much as you over the butler’s trick,

Zenophantus Ah, short cuts are no better for you than for other people, you see; the high road would have been safer, if not quite so quick.

Current edition Perseus

Ζηνόφαντος καὶ Καλλιδημίδης.

Καλλιδημίδης παρῆν, ὦ Ζηνόφαντε· τὸ δὲ ἐμὸν παράδοξόν τι ἐγένετο. οἶσθα γὰρ καὶ σύ που Πτοιόδωρον τὸν γέροντα;

Ζηνόφαντος τὸν ἄτεκνον, τὸν πλούσιον, ᾧ σε τὰ πολλὰ ᾔδειν συνόντα.

Ζηνόφαντος τί οὖν ἐγένετο; πάνυ γάρ τι παράδοξον ἐρεῖν ἔοικας.

Ζηνόφαντος ἀστεῖα γάρ, ὦ Καλλιδημίδη, πέπονθας. ὁ γέρων δὲ τί πρὸς ταῦτα;

Καλλιδημίδης πρῶτον μὲν ὑπεταράχθη πρὸς τὸ αἰφνίδιον, εἶτα συνείς, οἶμαι, τὸ γεγενημένον ἐγέλα καὶ αὐτός, οἷά γε ὁ οἰνοχόος εἴργασται.

Ζηνόφαντος πλὴν ἀλλʼ οὐδὲ σὲ τὴν ἐπίτομον ἐχρῆν τραπέσθαι· ἧκε γὰρ ἄν σοι διὰ τῆς λεωφόρου ἀσφαλέστερον, εἰ καὶ ὀλίγῳ βραδύτερον.

406 ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΥ ΚΑΙ ΤΑΝΤΑΛΟΥ

ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ Τί κλάεις, ὦ Τάνταλε; ἢ τί σεαυτὸν ὀδύρῃ 1 ἐπὶ τῇ λίμνῃ ἑστώς;

ΤΑΝΤΑΛΟΣ Ὅτι, ὦ Μένιππε, ἀπόλωλα ὑπὸ τοῦ δίψους.

ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ Οὕτως ἀργὸς εἶ, ὡς μὴ ἐπικύψας πιεῖν ἢ καὶ νὴ Δί' ἀρυσάμενος κοίλῃ τῇ χειρί;

ΤΑΝΤΑΛΟΣ Τοῦτ' αὐτὸ ἡ κόλασίς ἐστι, τὸ διψῆν τὴν ψυχὴν ὡς σῶμα οὖσαν.

ΤΑΝΤΑΛΟΣ Ὀρθῶς μὲν λέγεις· καὶ τοῦτο δ’ οὖν μέρος τῆς καταδίκης, τὸ ἐπιθυμεῖν πιεῖν μηδὲν δεόμενον.

ΤΑΝΤΑΛΟΣ Οὐδὲ τὸν ἐλλέβορον, ὦ Μένιππε, ἀναίνομαι πιεῖν, γένοιτό μοι μόνον.

Menippus And Tantalus

MENIPPUS Why are you crying, Tantalus? Why do you stand beside 1 the lake lamenting your lot?

TANTALUS Because, Menippus, I’m dying of thirst.

MENIPPUS Are you too lazy to bend your head down and drink, or even, bless us, to scoop the water up with your palm?

TANTALUS It’s no good bending down; the water runs away as soon as it feels me coming near, and, if ever I do scoop up any, and bring it to my mouth, I can’t wet the tip of my lips before it runs through my fingers somehow and leaves my hand dry as before.

MENIPPUS You’re the victim of a miracle, Tantalus. But tell me, just why do you need to drink? You have no body, for that’s been buried in Lydia. That could feel hunger and thirst. But you are a ghost; how can you still be thirsty or able to drink?

TANTALUS It’s just that that’s my punishment—that my ghost should be thirsty as if it were a body.

MENIPPUS Well, we’ll believe it, since you tell us you’re punished by thirst. But what do you find so terrible in that? Are you afraid of dying for lack of drink? I can’t see another Hades after this one, or a death hereafter taking us elsewhere.

TANTALUS You are quite right; but this is part of my sentence—to long to drink when I’ve no need.

MENIPPUS Nonsense, Tantalus: I think you really do need a drink—neat hellebore, 2 so help me; you’re the opposite of people bitten by mad dogs; you don’t fear water, but you do fear thirst.

TANTALUS I don’t mind drinking even hellebore—I only wish I could have some.

MENIPPUS Don’t worry, Tantalus, for neither you nor any other dead man will drink; that’s impossible. However, they’ve not all been condemned to thirst, as you do, for water which won’t wait for them.

Stable identifiers

Zenophantus

Ah, Callidemides, and how did you come by your end? As for me, I was free of Dinias’s table, and there died of a surfeit; but that is stale news; you were there, of course.

Callidemides

Yes, I was. Now there was an element of surprise about my fate. I suppose you know that old Ptoeodorus?

Zenophantus

The rich man with no children, to whom you gave most of your company?

Zenophantus

And what happened? this is interesting.

Zenophantus

Well, it was such a humorous exit. And how did the old man behave?

Callidemides

He was dreadfully distressed for the moment; then he saw, I suppose, and laughed as much as you over the butler’s trick,

Zenophantus

Ah, short cuts are no better for you than for other people, you see; the high road would have been safer, if not quite so quick.

Καλλιδημίδης

παρῆν, ὦ Ζηνόφαντε· τὸ δὲ ἐμὸν παράδοξόν τι ἐγένετο. οἶσθα γὰρ καὶ σύ που Πτοιόδωρον τὸν γέροντα;

Ζηνόφαντος

τὸν ἄτεκνον, τὸν πλούσιον, ᾧ σε τὰ πολλὰ ᾔδειν συνόντα.

Ζηνόφαντος

τί οὖν ἐγένετο; πάνυ γάρ τι παράδοξον ἐρεῖν ἔοικας.

Ζηνόφαντος

ἀστεῖα γάρ, ὦ Καλλιδημίδη, πέπονθας. ὁ γέρων δὲ τί πρὸς ταῦτα;

Καλλιδημίδης

πρῶτον μὲν ὑπεταράχθη πρὸς τὸ αἰφνίδιον, εἶτα συνείς, οἶμαι, τὸ γεγενημένον ἐγέλα καὶ αὐτός, οἷά γε ὁ οἰνοχόος εἴργασται.

Ζηνόφαντος

πλὴν ἀλλʼ οὐδὲ σὲ τὴν ἐπίτομον ἐχρῆν τραπέσθαι· ἧκε γὰρ ἄν σοι διὰ τῆς λεωφόρου ἀσφαλέστερον, εἰ καὶ ὀλίγῳ βραδύτερον.

ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ

Τί κλάεις, ὦ Τάνταλε; ἢ τί σεαυτὸν ὀδύρῃ ¹ ἐπὶ τῇ λίμνῃ ἑστώς;

ΤΑΝΤΑΛΟΣ

Ὅτι, ὦ Μένιππε, ἀπόλωλα ὑπὸ τοῦ δίψους.

ΜΕΝΙΠΠΟΣ

Οὕτως ἀργὸς εἶ, ὡς μὴ ἐπικύψας πιεῖν ἢ καὶ νὴ Δί' ἀρυσάμενος κοίλῃ τῇ χειρί;

ΤΑΝΤΑΛΟΣ

Τοῦτ' αὐτὸ ἡ κόλασίς ἐστι, τὸ διψῆν τὴν ψυχὴν ὡς σῶμα οὖσαν.

ΤΑΝΤΑΛΟΣ

Ὀρθῶς μὲν λέγεις· καὶ τοῦτο δ’ οὖν μέρος τῆς καταδίκης, τὸ ἐπιθυμεῖν πιεῖν μηδὲν δεόμενον.

ΤΑΝΤΑΛΟΣ

Οὐδὲ τὸν ἐλλέβορον, ὦ Μένιππε, ἀναίνομαι πιεῖν, γένοιτό μοι μόνον.

MENIPPUS

Why are you crying, Tantalus? Why do you stand beside ¹ the lake lamenting your lot?

TANTALUS

Because, Menippus, I’m dying of thirst.

MENIPPUS

Are you too lazy to bend your head down and drink, or even, bless us, to scoop the water up with your palm?

TANTALUS

It’s no good bending down; the water runs away as soon as it feels me coming near, and, if ever I do scoop up any, and bring it to my mouth, I can’t wet the tip of my lips before it runs through my fingers somehow and leaves my hand dry as before.

MENIPPUS

You’re the victim of a miracle, Tantalus. But tell me, just why do you need to drink? You have no body, for that’s been buried in Lydia. That could feel hunger and thirst. But you are a ghost; how can you still be thirsty or able to drink?

TANTALUS

It’s just that that’s my punishment—that my ghost should be thirsty as if it were a body.

MENIPPUS

Well, we’ll believe it, since you tell us you’re punished by thirst. But what do you find so terrible in that? Are you afraid of dying for lack of drink? I can’t see another Hades after this one, or a death hereafter taking us elsewhere.

TANTALUS

You are quite right; but this is part of my sentence—to long to drink when I’ve no need.

MENIPPUS

Nonsense, Tantalus: I think you really do need a drink—neat hellebore, ² so help me; you’re the opposite of people bitten by mad dogs; you don’t fear water, but you do fear thirst.

TANTALUS

I don’t mind drinking even hellebore—I only wish I could have some.

MENIPPUS

Don’t worry, Tantalus, for neither you nor any other dead man will drink; that’s impossible. However, they’ve not all been condemned to thirst, as you do, for water which won’t wait for them.