Plutarch, De Garrulitate, William Clark Helmbold (Translator), 13

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[13] but most talkers do not even have a reason for destroying themselves. For example, people were once talking in a barber’s shop about how adamantine¹ and unbreakable the despotism of Dionysius was. The barber laughed and said, Fancy your saying that about Dionysius, when I have my razor at his throat every few days or so! When Dionysius heard this, he crucified the barber.

It is not strange that barbers are a talkative clan, for the greatest chatterboxes stream in and sit in their chairs, so that they are themselves infected with the habit. It was a witty answer, for instance, that King Archelaü;s² gave to a loquacious barber, who, as he wrapped his towel around him, asked, How shall I cut your hair, Sire? In silence, said Archelaüs. And it was a barber³ also who first announced the great disaster of the Athenians in Sicily, having learned it in the Peiraeus from a slave, one of those who had escaped from the island. Then the barber left his shop and hurried at full speed to the city,

Lest another might win the glory

of imparting the news to the city,

and he come second.⁴

A panic naturally arose and the people gathered in assembly and tried to come at the origin of the rumour. So the barber was brought forward and questioned; yet he did not even know the name of his informant, but referred the origin to a nameless and unknown person. The assembly was enraged and cried out, Torture the cursed fellow! Put him on the rack! He has fabricated and concocted this tale! Who else heard it? Who believed it? The wheel was brought and the man was stretched upon it. Meanwhile there arrived bearers of the disastrous news, men who had escaped from the slaughter itself. All, therefore, dispersed, each to his private mourning, leaving the wretched fellow bound on the wheel. But when he was set free late in the day when it was already nearly evening, he asked the executioner if they had also heard how the general, Nicias, had died. Such an unconquerable and incorrigible evil does habit make garrulity.

De Garrulitate. Plutarch. William Clark Helmbold (Translator). Cambridge, MA. 1939.

Sponsored by Perseus Project, Tufts University.

Funding provided by The National Endowment for the Humanities.

Current edition Perseus

Concerning Talkativeness (English) (Plutarch. Moralia, Vol. VI. Helmbold, William Clark, translator. Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press; London: William Heinemann Ltd., 1939 (printing).)

Editions (1)

Περὶ ἀδολεσχίας Perseus (Plutarch. Plutarchi Chaeronensis Moralia, Vol IΙI. Vernardakēs, Grēgorios N., editor. Leipzig: Teubner, 1891.) — 13 focus

[13] οἱ δὲ πλεῖστοι τῶν ἀδολέσχων οὐδʼ αἰτίαν ἔχοντες ἀπολλύουσιν αὑτούς. οἷον ἐν κουρείῳ τινὶ λόγων γιγνομἑνων περὶ τῆς Διονυσίου τυραννίδος, ὡς ἀδαμαντίνη καὶ ἄρρηκτός ἐστι, γελάσας ὁ κουρεὺς 5 ταῦθʼ ὑμᾶς ἔφη περὶ Διονυσίου δεῖ λέγειν, οὗ ἐγὼ παρʼ ἡμέρας ὀλίγας ἐπὶ τοῦ τραχήλου τὸ ξυρὸν 509a ἔχω; ταῦτʼ ἀκούσας ὁ Διονύσιος ἀνεσταύρωσεν αὐτόν. ἐπιεικῶς δὲ λάλον ἐστὶ τὸ τῶν κουρέων γένος οἱ γὰρ ἀδολεσχότατοι προσρέουσι καὶ προσκαθίζουσιν, 10 ὥστʼ αὐτοὺς ἀναπίμπλασθαι τῆς συνηθείας. χαριέντως γοῦν ὁ βασιλεὺς Ἀρχέλαος, ἀδολέσχου κουρέως περιβαλόντος αὐτῷ τὸ ὠμόλινον καὶ πυθομένου πῶς σε κείρω, βασιλεῦ σιωπῶν ἔφη. κουρεὺς δὲ καὶ τὴν ἐν Σικελίᾳ τῶν Ἀθηναίων μεγάλην 15 κακοπραγίαν ἀπήγγειλε, πρῶτος ἐν Πειραιεῖ πυθόμενος 509b οἰκέτου τινὸς τῶν ἀποδεδρακότων ἐκεῖθεν. εἶτʼ ἀφεὶς τὸ ἐργαστήριον εἰς ἄστυ συνέτεινε δρόμῳ

μή τις κῦδος ἄροιτο

¹ τὸν λόγον εἰς τὴν πόλιν ἐμβαλών, 20

ὁ δὲ δεύτερος ἔλθοι.

γενομένης δὲ ταραχῆς οἷον εἰκός, εἰς ἐκκλησίαν ἀθροισθεὶς ὁ δῆμος ἐπὶ τὴν ἀρχὴν ἐβάδιζε τῆς φήμης. ἤγετʼ οὖν ὁ κουρεὺς καὶ ἀνεκρίνετο, μηδὲ τοὔνομα τοῦ φράσαντος εἰδὼς ἀλλʼ εἰς ἀνώνυμον 25 καὶ ἄγνωστον ἀναφέρων τὴν ἀρχὴν πρόσωπον. ὀργὴ δʼ οὖν² καὶ βοὴ τοῦ θεάτρου· βασάνιζε καὶ στρέβλου τὸν ἀλάστορα· πέπλασται ταῦτα καὶ συντέθειται· τίς δʼ ἄλλος ἤκουσε; τίς δʼ ἐπίστευσεν ἐκομίσθη τροχός, 509c κατετάθη ὁ ἄνθρωπος. ἐν τούτῳ παρῆσαν οἱ τὴν συμφορὰν ἀπαγγέλλοντες, ἐξ αὐτοῦ τοῦ ἔργου διαπεφευγότες, ἐσκεδάσθησαν οὖν πάντες ἐπὶ τὰ 5 οἰκεῖα πένθη, καταλιπόντες ἐν τῷ τροχῷ τὸν ἄθλιον ἐνδεδεμένον. ὀψὲ δὲ λυθεὶς ἤδη πρὸς ἑσπέραν ἠρώτα τὸν δημόσιον, εἰ καὶ περὶ Νικίου τοῦ στρατηγοῦ, ὃν τρόπον ἀπόλωλεν, ἀκηκόασιν. οὕτως ἄμαχόν τι 10 κακὸν καὶ ἀνουθέτητον ἡ συνήθεια ποιεῖ τὴν ἀδολεσχίαν.

Translations (1)

Of Garrulity, or Talkativeness Perseus (Plutarch. Plutarch's Morals, Vol. IV. Goodwin, William W., editor; Philips, John, translator. Boston: Little, Brown, and Company; Cambridge: Press of John Wilson and Son, 1874.) — 13 focus

[13] But most of your twattlers, without any cause or pretence at all, destroy themselves; as it happened when certain fellows began to talk pretty freely in a barber’s shop concerning the tyranny of Dionysius, that it was as secure and inexpugnable as a rock of adamant: I wonder, quoth the barber, laughing, that you should talk these things before me concerning Dionysius, whose throat is almost every day under my razor. Which scurrilous freedom of the barber being related to the tyrant, he caused him forthwith to be crucified. And indeed the generality of barbers are a prating generation of men; in regard the most loquacious praters usually resort to their shops, and there sit prattling; from whence the barbers also learn an ill habit of twattling. Pleasant therefore was the answer of Archelaus to the barber who, after he had cast the linen toilet about his shoulders, put this question to him, How shall I trim your majesty; In silence, quoth the king. It was a barber that first reported the news of the great overthrow which the Athenians received in Sicily; for being the first that heard the relation of it in the Piraeus, from a servant of one of those who had escaped out of the battle, he presently left his shop at sixes and sevens, and flew into the city as fast as his heels could carry him,

For fear some other should the honor claim

Of being first, when he but second came.

Now you may be sure that the first spreader of this news caused a great hubbub in the city, insomuch that the people, thronging together in the market-place, made diligent enquiry for the first divulger. Presently the barber was brought by head and shoulders to the crowd, and examined; but he could give no account of his author, only one that he never saw or knew in his life before had told him the news. Which so incensed the multitude, that they immediately cried out, To the rack with the traitor, tie the lying rascal neck and heels together. This is a mere story of the rogue’s own making. Who heard it? Who gave any credit to it beside himself? At the same instant the wheel was brought out, and the poor barber stretched upon it,—not to his ease, you may be sure. And then it was, and not before, that the news of the defeat was confirmed by several that had made a hard shift to escape the slaughter. Upon which the people scattered every one to his own home, to make their private lamentation for their particular losses, leaving the unfortunate barber bound fast to the wheel; in which condition he continued till late in the evening, before he was let loose. Nor would this reform the impertinent fool; for no sooner was he at liberty but he would needs be enquiring of the executioner, what news, and what was reported of the manner of Nicias the general’s being slain. So inexpugnable and incorrigible a vice is loquacity, gotten by custom and ill habit, that they cannot leave it off, though they were sure to be hanged.

Notes on the current edition

Concerning Talkativeness

1. Cf. Life of Dion, vii. (961 a), x. (962 b); Aelian, Varia Historia, vi. 12.

2. Cf. Moralia, 177 a.

3. Cf. Life of Nicias, xxx. (542 d-e).

4. Homer, Il., xxii. 207.

Plutarch De Garrulitate 13

William Clark Helmbold (Translator)

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